Top 5 Date Locations in Edinburgh

 Top 5 Dates in Edinburgh

From pheromones to Dutch courage – we’re with you every step of the way.

As every romantic comedy ever made will tell you, relationships can be tricky. From awkward silences to who pays the bill, dating probably makes you want to stab yourself with the nearest cocktail stick. Here are our top 5 alternative date venues in Edinburgh, complete with venue-appropriate chat up lines, guaranteed to make you appear witty, cultured, and charming. You’re welcome.

Secret Arcade
For a little bit of Dutch courage, skip the mixer and head down to this polish vodka bar. 5 shots for £10.99 and you can choose from a range of over 80 different vodkas (Itchy’s favourites include rose vodka for sweet sipping and vodka with flakes of gold for pretending you’re in a Flo Rida music video). Located on one of the winding alleys off Cockburn Street, it’s tricky to get there unless you know where to go (clue’s in the name). So if nothing else, you can impress him/her with your extensive city knowledge.
Chat up line: “przychodzisz tu czesto?” (“Do you come here often?”)

Stockbridge
Possibly better for date two or three as this can get a little young-married-couple-y… Think second hand bookshops, farmers markets, and specialty cheese shops. Hectors on Deanhaugh Street is a great mix of upbeat city bar and cosy local pub for a nice post-stroll pint.
Chat up line: “Did you know that organic basil is an aphrodisiac?”

Hanam’s Restaurant
One of the best places to eat and relax, Hanam’s has an extensive Kurdish and Middle Eastern menu (lots of hummus, stuffed vine leaves etc.). The balcony seats over 60 people and overlooks Victoria Street and Grassmarket. Curl up under a blanket to smoke a shisha pipe and eat some pitta bread. Try not to freeze your ass off as you pretend you’re in Dubai.
Replace chat up line with learning to blow smoke rings.

Camera Obscura
The world of illusions never fails to disappoint. We love the vortex tunnel (not a good idea after the vodka) and being able to view the whole city from inside a giant camera. Best to avoid the lenticular flip pictures, which show a happy couple who, when spun around, look as if they are going to kill each other (aptly titled ‘Before & After Marriage’).
Chat up line: (to be used post-vortex tunnel) “I’m a little disorientated…Can I have directions to your flat?”

Arthur’s Seat
Exercise produces endorphins, so walking up this extinct volcano will trick him/her into thinking that all that happiness they’re feeling comes from you. Foolproof. A trip to The Sheep Heid Inn will finish things off nicely, the board games in the bar will entertain you both if conversation isn’t quite flowing.
Chat up line: “Have you read ‘One Day’…?”

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